Use your ← → (arrow) keys to browse

“Honey, no offense, but sometimes I think I could shoot you and watch you kick.” – Raynomd Carver

First off, fuck your selfie and the gym you claim. Nobody has any interest in your yoga classes and your progress before the Bahamas. We don’t care about clean eating and squats and we sure as shit don’t care about your crossfit classes. I don’t see a girl in gym clothes working out for her own health and well being. I see an attention seeking social media whore fishing for likes. You all fish for compliments all day with statements like “Oh my God I’m such a fat ass.” or “I look like a hot mess.” and since you can’t fish for compliments in the women’s locker room at 24 Hour Fitness, the only thing left is to fish for likes on social media.

A quick assessment of a gym selfie would show you wearing clothes more revealing than your everyday attire. Not only are you showing your stomach and your cleavage, as your top covers little more than a bra, but your frequently penetrated vagina is eating your form fitting pants. And you have to be sure to put two images, front and back next to each other, so everybody can see your ass for good measure. You expect me to believe that this is about your health and well being?

If that is the case, why don’t I ever see you checking in to planned parenthood as you get tested after a condomless one night stand? Why don’t I see a picture of your dentist digging deep into your mouth for a cleaning? Last I checked, you’re yet to post a picture of the results from your last cholesterol check. This has nothing to do with health or bettering yourself. It’s all about attention. That’s why you spend 700 dollars on pants from lululemon and buy 5 pairs of running shoes to match all your outfits. You don’t spend time getting ready for the gym like it’s a damn nightclub if you’re doing it for your health. Yes, that yoga picture of you standing on your head and spreading your legs with your ass popping out like a still shot of a hoodrat twerking was all about healthy living. That’s as believable as a girl telling me “she never does this kind of thing” as a drunkenly smash my dick into her pussy.

I will not encourage this kind of behavior. From here on out, I will never like any such photo and I suggest you all do the same. Instead, I’ll leave a nice little comment under each photo telling them what an inspiration their gym selfie was. I was so inspired by the pants eating pussy and cleavage that I busted out the lotion, warm towel, and rubbed one out. That’s right. I will not like your gym selfie, but I will viciously masturbate to it and there’s nothing you can do to stop it. So go ahead you attention seeking social media whores, post away and just know that guys all over the world are beating their meat to your “progress.”

Also, if you’re a guy taking gym selfies, just kill yourself. It’s worse than women doing it.

Use your ← → (arrow) keys to browse

Share This